marryme-moriarty

breelandwalker:

feliciakainz:

carryonmywaywardalpaca:

dearborns:

#how many times have I quoted this in my lifetime #far too many and still not enough

Guys, btw, this is an actual insult

if he calls your mother a hamster, it indicates that she is a fast-breeding rodent— you can get the insult there

and if he says your father smelt of elderberries, well, wine was primarily made from elderberries in the time of king arthur. he’s calling his dad a drunk

more you know

mybiggaytumblog

mercuryjones:

dyannehs:

dyannehs:

HOLY SHIT.  MY NEIGHBOUR IS SCREAMING AT HER BOYFRIEND.  Yeah, the two that keep me up at odd hours of the night. AND I’M ONLY PICKING UP BITS AND PIECES BECAUSE HE’S NOT SHOUTING BUT I’M FAIRLY POSITIVE HE JUST TOLD HER HE’S GAY AND THAT HE’S BEEN CHEATING ON HER WITH HIS BOYFRIEND.

UPDATE.  UPDATE.  HE’S CHEATING ON HER WITH HER BROTHER.

SON OF A BITCH IT’S LIKE A BAD SOAP OPERA EPISODE.